While the topic of child custody, guardianship and maintenance is usually emotional, it sometimes becomes a contentious issue. In a bid to get the best for their child and themselves, parents often receive misinformation from well-meaning friends, co-workers, and relatives. This adversely affects not just them, but their kids as well.

As our primary goal is to help improve the lives of children and their families, we have debunked a few commonly believed myths that will help you and your family negotiate a peaceful outcome.

Myth 1: Custody and Parenting Time mean the same thing.

No, it doesn’t! 'Custody' has to do with parenting decisions, not time with the child. ‘Parenting Time’ is the amount of time spent with the child. ‘Custody’ can be shared even if you don’t want ‘Parenting Time’ to be shared. Too often parents get caught up in who has the power when it comes to the children. In fact, the parents only have duties and responsibilities and the honor of knowing and being parents to their children.

Myth 2: If my child doesn’t want to go with me to my Parenting Time, it must be because of parental alienation.

While there are many reasons a child may not want to see a parent, two of the most common reasons they may not want to attend 'Parenting Time' are:

1. the child may simply want to go back to when Mom and Dad and Baby were one happy family or
2. the child may be upset about the parents arguing all the time.

Neither of these two reasons is parental alienation. A parent who wishes the best for their child would encourage the child to go to the Parenting Time anyway and would help the child tide over the depression of Mom and Dad splitting up the family and fighting all the time. If done correctly and with care, the children can recover completely and lead happy, healthy lives.

Myth 3: I don’t have to pay child maintenance if I don’t get to see my kids.

Contrary to popular belief, you have to pay child support no matter what. When it comes to the issue of seeing your kids, your chances are negatively affected if you haven’t paid maintenance. Nonpayment of support shows the judge that you don’t care about the wellbeing of your children. You must keep in mind that unpaid support can be pursued retroactively, at times even by going back three years or more. Since child maintenance is the right of the child, no parent can waive off child support, ever.

With more than 30 years of experience, we at Gary Vlug Barrister and Solicitor, strive to support and guide you through your legal issues and do our best to negotiate a peaceful outcome. For a complete list of services, please click here. If you have any questions about your legal situation, we’d love to hear from you. Contact us here.